Episode 5: Escape

"If you like Piña Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape."


For the 5th rendition of the Comrade Contrary files the subject with be relationships.

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Let me stop you right there, despite the fact I am destined to fail this will attempt to be as entertaining as a Michael Bay film.....without Pamela Voorhees and Freddy Krueger... The slower ones of you may still be struggling with the connection between the Piña Colada song and relationships, because I mean seriously what do coconut and pineapple rum have to do with relationships? Well...the song is about a man who is awake in bed at night with his partner yet is unsatisfied with the relationship. So he picks up the newspaper and starts reading the 'lonely hearts' section. There he finds an article written by a woman looking for her perfect man. The article reads; 'if you like Piña Coladas, and getting caught in the rain, if you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain. If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape. I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape.' Upon reading this the man writes back; yes I like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain, I'm not much into health food, more into champagne, I'll meet you at a bar called O'Malley's, there we will plan our escape. As you can imagine they meet fall in love and run away together, the song concludes.

Now, very few relationships are this simple, particularly since the number of people that like Piña Coladas has significantly dropped since the late 70's, those people also tend to be pirates. Still the principle is there that if two people like something that is obscure they will most likely rather be together than with someone who doesn't share that interest. However please do not think that I am endorsing affairs or breaking up with your partner because you found someone better, that is a pretty nasty thing to do, but some people work better than others. This is a fact that anyone who has been in more than 3 relationships will understand, and just because you do not fit well together as a couple doesn't mean you can't be friends (but don't push yourself or the other person).

Still on that note this concludes today's blog post before it gets too sappy, on an end note;

'Yes, I like  Piña Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne.
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon, and cut through all this red tape.
At a bar called O'Malley's, where we'll plan our escape.'

* SIDE NOTE: This is not intended to be derogatory to any homosexuals I myself am one, this was solely intended as a pop-culture reference and nothing more. If you have a problem with it, comment and I will remove it, if you have a problem with it in general, write to your local member of parliament and have your government take steps to minimize the  derogatory terms towards minorities.